Out-of-place Gyros, Deja Vu, and This Particular Location.

Today I bought and ate a gyro from Main Street Gyros on Main St. These are my favorite gyros in America, so far. I’m not exactly sure what it is—it’s the seasoning—but they’re delicious; almost as good as the real Greek ones. The men working there are Greek and they listen to terrible Greek music, so the difference is slight.

What struck me about this particular gyro was its packaging. It came in a little bag made just for it—that’s not the striking part, although I am fascinated by particular packaging—and it said “Devanco Foods: Chicago’s Favorite.” At first this meant nothing to me, and then I looked around my apartment (I got it “to go”) and said, “I’m in Seattle, right?”

This anecdote points to a much larger problem. Over the holidays, I could never remember what city I was in, but I only traveled to Chicago, and onto St. Louis, and back in the course of two weeks. That should be enough time to readjust. But for me, something lags.

Today I experienced déjà vu in my apartment (in Seattle). Déjà vu may indicate, more so than anything else, a sense of dwelling. It means the mind has begun to project its future self in the present (or the past; T.S. Eliot help!). I never truly feel at home somewhere until I have experienced déjà vu because my mind has not seen itself in the same spot beyond its current station. It is the avowal of a future geographic space: me included! But when I don’t experience déjà vu, is that a disavowal of a future space, of a future me? Or is it the case that I refuse to commit to a space? Perhaps this is about commitment (God help me!). Commitment might mean the same thing tomorrow, and so why shouldn’t I experience déjà vu, when in fact, it’s not the future I’m experiencing at all, but what takes place every day.

And here, the gyro was supposed to break up my routine! I was just going to have a sandwich.